– The culture shock is real. I cannot deal with the sounds of burps, farts, pleghm, snoring and coughing coming at me from every direction. I am highly sensitive when it comes to noises so I was extremely agitated.
– Regret. Why am I here? What have I done?
– So many negative and aggressive thoughts and sensations during the entire morning
– Starting to feel like I am on coke. Along with the aggression a massive hit of ego and self-confidence. Where did this come from?
– Consciously changed my mindset. I did not travel all this way to be a pussy and complain about pain and get bored. I had to remind myself why I wanted to come here, of Seneca the stoic who intrigues me greatly, and that I cannot stand lazy people so I would work very hard.
– It worked. My goal has become so clear again to me, it is like all my senses are working 200%. My memory seems complete, my attention to detail is bizarre, nothing can worry me.
– I feel such a strong urge to write.
– There are so many pregnant girls here.
– The guy vomiting every morning is really getting on my nerves.
-So many aggressive thoughts and emotions again.
– Why must these people make these disgusting and infuriating noises?
– The highest rank female teacher pressured me to sit completely still for the entire session, I thought I wouldn’t be able to suppress the pain. I COMPLETED HER CHALLENGE! I may have dislocated my hip in the process what a pain I was feeling just to prove myself.The teacher told me in private after the session that I was the first female of our group to do it and she thought I have a very powerful mind. OOOH YEAH!
– I had a visualization like I was seeing something that would happen in my future.
– There was a follow female student who all of a sudden was placed behind me he day previously. She had been irritating me with her noises and just for no real reason. THEN IT HIT ME! She reminded me of a girl I don’t like for no real reason other than something that has happened before I had any affiliation with her what so ever. I understood that this look alike was put in my way for a reason, I just had to wait for me to understand.
– When I was going to sleep I had another visualization
– Starting to master my negativity and feel calm and at peace
– I bossed the hell out of the no moving again! I am stronger than I thought.
– Feeling a strong urge to phone my boyfriend and my mum
– People are starting to crack. Taking a suspicious amount of toilet breaks, turning up later and later each session and asking for back support. I would not be one of this peopl.
– Observed my pain objectively and did not react.
– Hallucinations when I was in bed, seeing myself from an out of body perspective. like ketamine…
– Getting memories of unease.
– Starting to talk to myself in the mirror of my bathroom
– I and that look alike woman headbutted and I understood why her presence was necessary for me to let go of an unjustified dislike for a girl I don’t even know because of my own insecurity.
–I got a non-verbal compliment for my necklace.
– The person who dings the dong had failed to wake up on time. Everyone was late but I thought I had slept throug
h the noise. In my rush to get to the Dhamma Hall I even forewent my underwear!
– I fell asleep during the meditation and woke up with a stiff neck and a pile of dribble on my cushion.
-There was a nother girl who reminded me of a toad, and I suddely understood why I needed her to be there to help me progress,
– Even in noble silence all of the ladies were getting such a connection. Like we were a boned family.
– For the first time desiring contact with other people at the centre.
– A girl started crying. She was an old student so I was quite surprised.
– I forced a very heavy subject into my head during the session. I needed to disect the pain of that situation
– I love walking through thenature, it is so liberating.
– ENLIGHTENED! So calm and harmonious, well wishing others, understanding the pathit is I want to take and the future I want to work on.
– We Got our phones and valuables back! I could finally message my dearest!
– We broke the noble silence.
– I was told my multiple people that they had waited 10 days to finally get a picture with me
– I have written a note of motivation and goodwill for the ext inhibitant of my room. I hope it will help her.